The start of the New Year is a good time to take stock and think about who you are and what you stand for. I am reminded of this by our daily newspaper, The Record (northern NJ), which publishes their Editorial Credo every year on January 1. Continuing that theme, one of the people I have started following on Twitter is Chris Brogan. In his January 1, 2011, blog he presents his "3 Words for 2011". Chris has been doing this for several years and inspiring others to also choose their three words. After reading his blog, I thought it was a great idea, but couldn't think of three words. Then this morning, as I was driving to Sunday morning minyan and bagel breakfast at my temple, my words came to me: Caring, Integrity, and Joy.
Caring: part of what makes me who I am is that I care -- about people, about ideas, about the world around me, about what other people think about me. Sometimes though I forget how important other people are. The other day, while trying to clear up my desk, an old fortune cookie fortune appeared "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting their battle too." So, in 2011 I will remember to care about me and about others. (As a start, no more snarky comments, at least not in public). And there will be another blog on this, our Rabbi spoke about "you don't know what you don't know" about other people; always give them the benefit of the doubt.
Integrity: just as The Record reiterates who they are and what they stand for, I too must stand for something. Integrity is being truthful, being loyal, doing the right thing, for yourself and for others. These past few years I have been drifting away from who I am, which is why I'm in the midst of a journey to find myself again. Partially it is spiritual (one of the reasons I went to temple this morning, I am making a real effort to be more involved on a regular basis). And it's also physical. After being a gym junkie for several years and being in the best physical shape I'd ever been in, I didn't just slide, I fell hard. So, I am starting to reclaim my body. Shoveling two feet of snow last week reminded me of how good it feels to use your muscles (as well as reminding me of how bad you feel when you're out-of-shape). In 2011, I will work on re-centering myself, because you can't be true to others if you're not true to yourself.
Joy: the world has become a very scary place, but if you always dwell on that it can overwhelm you. I know that life isn't always fun. But that doesn't mean you can't enjoy what you're doing. I have become better at letting things go, not always having to fight the good fight. But I need to do that more, to look for the good in things and people. And I can help bring more joy to other people, particularly my family. In 2011, I will remember to enjoy what I'm doing, to look for the silver linings, and to try to bring joy to others.
Having taken these three words on as my guide for 2011 and, just as importantly, putting them out there, I have made a commitment. I will follow-up throughout the year and let you know how I'm doing. In the meantime, have you chosen your three words?
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Making Gratitude a Habit
As we approach Thanksgiving, it's time to think about, besides turkey, giving thanks. Although this is a special time for thanks, gratitude is something that should be a part of our everyday life. During the Friday night service last week, our Rabbi, Debra Orenstein, spoke about how to make gratitude a habit. One way that she suggested was to break your routine, which allows you to look at things in a different way. One example was traveling to another country -- it's so wonderful to be there, but once you get home how very wonderful your own bed, and familiar food, and familiar language is (check my blogs on visiting Japan to see how that works!) A closer to home example was to take a different route to work, giving you the opportunity to notice what is around you.
I work from my home office, which makes it hard to take a different route to work. However, most mornings, as I finish breakfast and go up to my second floor office, Charley, my two-year old rescue cat, follows me. He sits at the bottom of the stairs leading to my third floor bedroom and waits for me to notice (if I don't, he'll let out a small meow). At that point I'm expected to follow him upstairs, with him stopping to turn and look to make sure I'm behind him. Several head skritches and tummy rubs later, Charley's ready for his morning nap and I'm ready to go back to my computer. A chance to think about gratitude? Absolutely!
So, how are you going to make gratitude a habit?
I work from my home office, which makes it hard to take a different route to work. However, most mornings, as I finish breakfast and go up to my second floor office, Charley, my two-year old rescue cat, follows me. He sits at the bottom of the stairs leading to my third floor bedroom and waits for me to notice (if I don't, he'll let out a small meow). At that point I'm expected to follow him upstairs, with him stopping to turn and look to make sure I'm behind him. Several head skritches and tummy rubs later, Charley's ready for his morning nap and I'm ready to go back to my computer. A chance to think about gratitude? Absolutely!So, how are you going to make gratitude a habit?
Monday, November 15, 2010
R E S P E C T -- It's Not Just a Song
"R E S P E C T -- find out what it means to me," sang Aretha Franklin. The dictionary definition of respect is: to hold in high or special regard. Respect isn't something you just get, it's something you have to earn. And it is one of the most important aspects of your business. While it can be very hard to earn respect, it is very easy to lose it.
In Hebrew, gossip is called Lashon Hara, which is translated as "the evil tongue". A story tells about a Rabbi chiding a woman for spreading a tale about someone. He tells her to get a feather pillow, bring it to the town square, and then rip it open. Of course the wind blows the feathers all over. The Rabbi then tells the woman to gather up the feathers and remake the pillow. She tells him she can't, as the feathers have scattered and are impossible to collect. The Rabbi explains that is what happened with the tale she told, she can never "undo" what she said because the story scattered like the feathers. The same thing is true regarding respect -- once you do something that hurts your reputation, you can't easily undo it.
Recently a Washington Post sports columnist found out how easy it is to lose credibility and respect. The full story is here, in a column by the Post's ombudsman, Andrew Alexander. Here's a quick summary. Columnist Mike Wise discussed on his radio show that he was going to post a tweet with false news to see if it would be picked up without being fact-checked. He did and it was. The management at the Post was horrified and suspended Wise for a month. He apologized profusely and accepted the punishment. Some of his readers and listeners felt the punishment was too severe, after all this was just social media, not the newspaper. The end of the article explains it all. Alexander wrote, "But at its core, what Wise did isn't about social media. It's about fabrication, which is indefensible, even if done in jest. Our business is truth. A journalist's falsehood on Twitter is the same as a falsehood in the paper. . . . In his radio apology announcing his own suspension, Wise said 'Integrity, being right before being first, is the only thing genuine journalists have left in this world.' He correctly added that his own 'stupid, irresponsible experiment' had 'cost me a chunk of my own credibility.' And The Post's."
So remember, RESPECT is not just a song, it's a word to live by. Make sure you earn it and then don't do anything to lose it. Our methods of communications may be modern, but old-fashioned values like respect and credibility never go out of style.
[Yes, it's been a while since I've blogged, long story. In short, I thought I was switching to Word Press. It didn't happen. It's good to be back.]
In Hebrew, gossip is called Lashon Hara, which is translated as "the evil tongue". A story tells about a Rabbi chiding a woman for spreading a tale about someone. He tells her to get a feather pillow, bring it to the town square, and then rip it open. Of course the wind blows the feathers all over. The Rabbi then tells the woman to gather up the feathers and remake the pillow. She tells him she can't, as the feathers have scattered and are impossible to collect. The Rabbi explains that is what happened with the tale she told, she can never "undo" what she said because the story scattered like the feathers. The same thing is true regarding respect -- once you do something that hurts your reputation, you can't easily undo it.
Recently a Washington Post sports columnist found out how easy it is to lose credibility and respect. The full story is here, in a column by the Post's ombudsman, Andrew Alexander. Here's a quick summary. Columnist Mike Wise discussed on his radio show that he was going to post a tweet with false news to see if it would be picked up without being fact-checked. He did and it was. The management at the Post was horrified and suspended Wise for a month. He apologized profusely and accepted the punishment. Some of his readers and listeners felt the punishment was too severe, after all this was just social media, not the newspaper. The end of the article explains it all. Alexander wrote, "But at its core, what Wise did isn't about social media. It's about fabrication, which is indefensible, even if done in jest. Our business is truth. A journalist's falsehood on Twitter is the same as a falsehood in the paper. . . . In his radio apology announcing his own suspension, Wise said 'Integrity, being right before being first, is the only thing genuine journalists have left in this world.' He correctly added that his own 'stupid, irresponsible experiment' had 'cost me a chunk of my own credibility.' And The Post's."
So remember, RESPECT is not just a song, it's a word to live by. Make sure you earn it and then don't do anything to lose it. Our methods of communications may be modern, but old-fashioned values like respect and credibility never go out of style.
[Yes, it's been a while since I've blogged, long story. In short, I thought I was switching to Word Press. It didn't happen. It's good to be back.]
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Loved the Trip, But It's Good to be Home
Yes, we are home; we actually got home on Monday, June 28, but between jet lag, catching up with stuff, doing laundry, etc., this is the first time I've had to visit the blog.
Our last morning in Japan (Monday, June 28) we went with Jeff to take the boys to school. And we were able to get packing tape at the 7-11 where we parked (the school's parking lot is not available as there is construction going on). The tape is for the box of books we're checking as luggage (guide books, books we read on the trip); my suitcase was borderline overweight on the trip over, don't want that to happen again. Once we got the box taped up, we walked to the grocery store and picked up food for lunch (that we would eat on the train). There are some photos of the fish and octopus we didn't buy.
Jeff got us to the train station, our train showed up (trains are never late in Japan), and we were on our way from Mishima to Shinagawa. Once there, we found the correct platform for the Narita Express and a few minutes later our train showed up. A smooth hour later we were at Terminal 1, Narita Airport. Even the airports in Japan are quieter, cleaner, and easier to navigate. Checking in was easy (ahh, the joy of being silver elite!) which left us plenty of time to buy last minute omiyage (Japanese for gifts). Mostly we bought food (some more green tea Kit Kat bars, another box of wasabi Kit Kat bars) and water and tea for the flight.
Flight wasn't bad, a few bouncy spots. As expected, the food wasn't quite as good as on the way over. This time I watched "Lost in Translation" (not a great movie, but great scenes from Japan and very true depiction of what it's like); the first half of "Gone With the Wind" (decided it was fine to end with Scarlett declaring that she'd never go hungry again), and two more episodes of "The Big Bang Theory".
We were near the front of economy, so we were off the plane pretty quickly, which meant almost no line at immigration. Our luggage came out fairly early (Kate's suitcase was the second one out), which meant we got through Customs quickly as well. Nancy's husband Mike was waiting and helped get everything out to the car. Amazingly, we were on the NJ Turnpike heading home within 40 minutes of landing.
We wound up going to Nancy's parents' house for a welcome home BBQ. Tuesday morning was breakfast with Mike's mom, followed by lots of laundry. Kate and her cat headed home to Virginia Wednesday morning.
Here are photos from our last morning in Mishima and a few photos of stuff I brought home from Japan. The glass items came from Kurashiki, as did the mobile and the little cat pitcher.
It was a great trip -- Japan is a beautiful place. Kate and I agreed there are still many parts of it we need to explore, but not for a while. Next trip we do together will be someplace else (we're thinking about Vancouver). But for now, we're tired of airplanes, hotels, and crowds. It's good to be home.
Our last morning in Japan (Monday, June 28) we went with Jeff to take the boys to school. And we were able to get packing tape at the 7-11 where we parked (the school's parking lot is not available as there is construction going on). The tape is for the box of books we're checking as luggage (guide books, books we read on the trip); my suitcase was borderline overweight on the trip over, don't want that to happen again. Once we got the box taped up, we walked to the grocery store and picked up food for lunch (that we would eat on the train). There are some photos of the fish and octopus we didn't buy.
Jeff got us to the train station, our train showed up (trains are never late in Japan), and we were on our way from Mishima to Shinagawa. Once there, we found the correct platform for the Narita Express and a few minutes later our train showed up. A smooth hour later we were at Terminal 1, Narita Airport. Even the airports in Japan are quieter, cleaner, and easier to navigate. Checking in was easy (ahh, the joy of being silver elite!) which left us plenty of time to buy last minute omiyage (Japanese for gifts). Mostly we bought food (some more green tea Kit Kat bars, another box of wasabi Kit Kat bars) and water and tea for the flight.
Flight wasn't bad, a few bouncy spots. As expected, the food wasn't quite as good as on the way over. This time I watched "Lost in Translation" (not a great movie, but great scenes from Japan and very true depiction of what it's like); the first half of "Gone With the Wind" (decided it was fine to end with Scarlett declaring that she'd never go hungry again), and two more episodes of "The Big Bang Theory".
We were near the front of economy, so we were off the plane pretty quickly, which meant almost no line at immigration. Our luggage came out fairly early (Kate's suitcase was the second one out), which meant we got through Customs quickly as well. Nancy's husband Mike was waiting and helped get everything out to the car. Amazingly, we were on the NJ Turnpike heading home within 40 minutes of landing.
We wound up going to Nancy's parents' house for a welcome home BBQ. Tuesday morning was breakfast with Mike's mom, followed by lots of laundry. Kate and her cat headed home to Virginia Wednesday morning.
Here are photos from our last morning in Mishima and a few photos of stuff I brought home from Japan. The glass items came from Kurashiki, as did the mobile and the little cat pitcher.
It was a great trip -- Japan is a beautiful place. Kate and I agreed there are still many parts of it we need to explore, but not for a while. Next trip we do together will be someplace else (we're thinking about Vancouver). But for now, we're tired of airplanes, hotels, and crowds. It's good to be home.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Rain's Not a Problem, but a Monsoon? Day 13 in Japan
It was our last full day in Japan and the plans were to do something fun and see some new things. Yuko had a trip planned to the Hakone region. It's about one-half hour from Mishima (at least the start of the area) and has museums, a lake, hot springs, boat rides, and other things to see and do. It was cloudy when we left the apartment but as we climbed the road into the mountains it got foggier and foggier, making it hard to see the road. And then it started to rain. By the time we got to our first stop, Hakone Sekisho, the Hakone checkpoint, it was pouring and the wind was blowing. It wasn't really a monsoon, but it sure felt like one.
The Hakone Sekisho was built by the Tokugawa Shogunate in 1619 as one of 53 checkpoints throughout Japan. This was during the Edo Period (Edo was the original name of Tokyo). The Hakone checkpoint was considered to be the biggest and most important one. The primary purpose of the checkpoints were to control arms entering Edo and women attempting to leave Edo. This checkpoint, known for its strictness, was primarily responsible for keeping women from escaping from Edo. My photos include restored areas of the checkpoint (complete with rain and mist) and at least one misty photo of the lake. Our next stop was for lunch at a very nice restaurant, La Terrazza (Life Art Museum, Italian Restaurant, Select Shop, Book Store). Here the pizza was much more authentic, although some of the toppings and some of the descriptions were a little odd (see the photos). And the order of fried zucchini had no resemblance to what we're used to -- it was done tempura style and included two small fish (again, see the photo). The pizzas were good (and I even got to have anchovies!)
We headed back to Mishima, as the wind was blowing even harder and the rain was pouring down -- not a day to explore gardens or lookout points. The roads were still very foggy, until we got through the mountains. Once we were back on the outskirts of Mishima, the rain stopped, except for a drizzle, the fog was gone, and the weather was nice.
Kate and I walked to the train station and made our reservations for tomorrow (Monday) for the Shinkansen from Mishima to Shinagawa and then the Narita Express back to the airport. It was, as usual, amusing as the two clerks helping us professed little knowledge of English (although they do take it throughout high school). The male clerk carefully went over our tickets with us, in Japanese, including the times (the tickets do have English letters and Roman numerals, so we knew they were correct). This caused even the female clerk to look amused as she knew we didn't understand him.
Back at the house, I read Hewitt two Little Bear stories and we read a Frog and Toad story together,alternating pages (these were the two books we have Hewitt for his birthday). I also got to read Hewitt and Jonah one Little Bear and two Frog and Toad stories for bedtime. Jeff made us another delicious dinner and we had birthday cake for dessert. We've started packing and are looking forward to our last morning in Japan.
Here are the day 13 photos.
The Hakone Sekisho was built by the Tokugawa Shogunate in 1619 as one of 53 checkpoints throughout Japan. This was during the Edo Period (Edo was the original name of Tokyo). The Hakone checkpoint was considered to be the biggest and most important one. The primary purpose of the checkpoints were to control arms entering Edo and women attempting to leave Edo. This checkpoint, known for its strictness, was primarily responsible for keeping women from escaping from Edo. My photos include restored areas of the checkpoint (complete with rain and mist) and at least one misty photo of the lake. Our next stop was for lunch at a very nice restaurant, La Terrazza (Life Art Museum, Italian Restaurant, Select Shop, Book Store). Here the pizza was much more authentic, although some of the toppings and some of the descriptions were a little odd (see the photos). And the order of fried zucchini had no resemblance to what we're used to -- it was done tempura style and included two small fish (again, see the photo). The pizzas were good (and I even got to have anchovies!)
We headed back to Mishima, as the wind was blowing even harder and the rain was pouring down -- not a day to explore gardens or lookout points. The roads were still very foggy, until we got through the mountains. Once we were back on the outskirts of Mishima, the rain stopped, except for a drizzle, the fog was gone, and the weather was nice.
Kate and I walked to the train station and made our reservations for tomorrow (Monday) for the Shinkansen from Mishima to Shinagawa and then the Narita Express back to the airport. It was, as usual, amusing as the two clerks helping us professed little knowledge of English (although they do take it throughout high school). The male clerk carefully went over our tickets with us, in Japanese, including the times (the tickets do have English letters and Roman numerals, so we knew they were correct). This caused even the female clerk to look amused as she knew we didn't understand him.
Back at the house, I read Hewitt two Little Bear stories and we read a Frog and Toad story together,alternating pages (these were the two books we have Hewitt for his birthday). I also got to read Hewitt and Jonah one Little Bear and two Frog and Toad stories for bedtime. Jeff made us another delicious dinner and we had birthday cake for dessert. We've started packing and are looking forward to our last morning in Japan.
Here are the day 13 photos.
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